3... 2... 1... Aaaaaah!

Water Parks: Noah's Ark Water Park, Wisconsin Dells, WI
by Joanna

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The only picture we took - the sign!

As a couple of our adventures have, this one started with a wedding. Post-graduation, we and everyone we knew spread out across the United States, so seeing anyone from college always involves travelling. And, if we’re already there, we might as well have an adventure! This time, we found ourselves in Wisconsin for the first time.  We are huge water park fans and the Wisconsin Dells are known as the water park capital of the world (which has always seemed weird to me because of, well, winter). We only had one day for a side trip, so which better one to pick than the largest water park in the United States: Noah’s Ark Water Park. Home of “America’s first nearly vertical waterslide loop.” Cue the adventure:

As their website reads, the Scorpion’s Tail is 10 stories tall and you shoot down it at 50+ feet per second. We’ve been to a lot of them parks now, and over time I have found the best way to tackle an intimidating and potentially terrifying ride like this is to catch it at a five minute wait or less. That way, there's no time to think about backing out. Unfortunately, this day, there was enough time to pause on every landing, hear countless screams, and make room for a handful of people taking their walk of shame back down the stairs. In other words, enough time to second guess. 
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To reiterate for those of you who know me and to explain to those who don’t: I don't like feeling my heart. Drop-rides (along with nightmares, exercise, & terrifying experiences) always make me feel my heart. So somewhere between stepping off the weigh-in scale and climbing into the chamber, my resolve crumbled. There were tears involved and that’s all I’m going to say about that! I almost felt bad for the operator, who seemed extremely uncomfortable to be in charge of this clearly traumatic experience. "If you're scared, grab onto your swimsuit strap," she offered, before locking the hatch. If. 

Almost immediately, the smoothest, most unnerving female voice calmly counted down, "Three...Two...One..."

Mean boys that they are, Justin and our friend made me go first. I hope I struck terror in their hearts with my rather unfeminine bellow when the trap door dropped open. And then just like that, I was through the loop and at the bottom, climbing out a survivor, still shivering from excess adrenaline. Woot, I made it! Never again...

Justin's experience, at least as he told it to me, was a bit less emotional and memorable. Maybe I’ll get him to tell you about one where he was the sad puppy!

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Have you been to Noah’s Ark Water Park? If so, were you brave enough for the Scorpion’s Tail? Do you have a story from another ride there? Tell us in the comments!
 
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Our Favorite Photos From The Trip:
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We don’t have any! We only have 1 good picture and no video from our day trip there. Luckily, the park just posted this point of view video on Youtube! 

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Top Tips & Notes for Next Time

1. When you cross your arms over your chest, grab onto your swimsuit strap (if you’re a girl, anyway). Amazing how comforting grabbing onto an inanimate piece of fabric can be!
2. Aim for a short wait for the Scorpion’s Tail – less time to think about backing out!
3. Scorpion’s Tail has weight restrictions to help ensure you make it through the loop. While there’s a trap door for people who don’t make it to crawl out of, the park’s first line of defense is to weigh everyone before they ride.
4. Sunscreen. Sunscreen. Sunscreen. It is a water park, after all.
5. Justin and I have both found over time, especially with rides like this that are short and fast, that holding our breath for most of it helps avoid inhaling water since we never know how much splashing in our face we’ll get – after the initial scream, of course!

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